My Favorite “Gswede Sunday” Articles – Year 1

Last month was the 3 year anniversary of my blog (Gswede Sunday). When I began this writing experience in March 2008, I had no idea it would become my top personal passion. I love to write and it usually came easy to me although I didn’t do enough of it prior to my first article.

What’s interesting is that I started the blog in the midst of the busiest time in my life. I had a one year old son and another child on the way. In addition, my wife had a demanding job and I was in the 5th month of my half-year parental leave.

The biggest help came from my friend Sheldon, who gave me a gentle push; I started soon thereafter. He’s frequently encouraged me to give the world more of my thoughts as he usually enjoyed my philosophy on life. It was inspiring to get that final nudge from him!

It took some time to find my rhythm and style although the process was fulfilling. The challenge is still present to create a weekly story that I like which pleases me. I never want to feel too comfortable with the writing process.

Below are 15 (title, a quote and link) of my favorite articles from Year 1. Some tended to be more popular with my readers and those are included as well. If you have read some of my past articles, I want to thank you for taking the time out of your busy day. My appreciation runs deep for all my readers.

Finally, if what you love to do most is missing from you life, I encourage you to act on or find that passion today, not tomorrow. Being busy or not having time should not be an excuse. In conversations with friends throughout the years, it’s clear that “Me Time” frequently takes a backseat to the daily routines in life. In my opinion, doing what you love (if only for an hour a week) should always be in the driver’s seat!

My life has improved immeasurably from my weekly blog and it’s one of the biggest joys in my life. I cannot imagine a life without putting pen to paper.

Happy Gswede Sunday!
--
Are you Better off now than you were 4 Years ago? – March 23, 2008

A quote:
Life should be about progressing and improving in the aforementioned areas but sadly far too many people don't examine their life at all. No one can be great in all these areas but these are key areas to look at, work on and monitor for success and happiness.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/03/are-you-better-off-now-than-you-were-4.html
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CHOOSE WISELY for marriage – March 30, 2008

A quote:
A successful friend (and good man) didn't choose wisely when he met and married a woman that was not someone he was really interested in or anything like the women he had dated before. He now has a child and is a shade above miserable although he puts on a good face. Sad thing is, he knew better and always chose wisely in the past. A weak moment may cost him a lifetime of pain.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/03/choose-wisely-for-marriage.html
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Ken Mack - A Unique Perspective on Barack Obama – April 20, 2008

A quote:
Ken's success has never surprised me. Like Obama, he is smart, focused and knew what he wanted to do from an early age. That dream has been fulfilled and he is currently a tenured professor at Harvard Law School.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/04/ken-mack-unique-perspective-on-barack.html
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Temptation - Don't Fall for it – April 27, 2008

A quote:
A good friend of mine was frequently tempted with women when he was single. He is an engaging, charming and smart man. That combination has massive appeal. Fortunately, he survived his single life relatively unscathed although there was some luck involved

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/04/temptation-dont-fall-for-it.html
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Leisure Time - Do you get enough? – May 11, 2008

A quote:
Many use the people (spouse, family member) or time excuse for not getting leisure time. They only need to be a little stronger or bolder. "Things to do" or "unhappy people" will always try to stop you but who ultimately gets hurt as the years fly by?

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/05/leisure-time-do-you-get-enough.html
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Welcome to Swedish Paradise – June 8, 2008

A quote:
Since the weather has been warm and delightful for weeks, we were happy to embrace the Swedish archipelago for a few days. After an easy drive north to a small ferry, we reached our island destination in 75 minutes. The final part of our journey was a short and relaxing motorboat ride to the house.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/06/welcome-to-swedish-paradise.html
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Are you making POWER MOVES? – July 3, 2008

A quote:
What are POWER MOVES?

Moves that one makes in life to advance personal and business goals, increase quality of life, help others, inspire and be a productive citizen / positive family person. The moves must be primarily positive and advance the aforementioned areas forward more often than not. In ANY situation, POWER MOVES should be top of mind.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/07/are-you-making-power-moves.html
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Take the EMOTION out of it – July 20, 2008

A quote:
An emotional attachment to someone or something often makes a person forget about the potential downside and only focus on the upside. Emotion is a great thing but it has to be used with caution. Emotion with wise decision making is the best way to live life and often leads to success. Emotion with unwise decisions will give you a life at best, decent and at worst, miserable beyond belief. Who really wants the latter?

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/07/take-emotion-out-of-it.html
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Equal or better, Preferably BETTER – August 10, 2008

A quote:
Definition for Equal or Better, Preferably Better:

To consider someone for relationships/marriage ONLY if they are equal or better to your qualities and/or characteristics as an individual. That doesn't mean that everything has to be the same but overall, she/he should be on a level playing field with you. Equal is the lowest you should accept. Ideally, the person should be BETTER so that you can learn from them and have even more power and strength as a couple which will help immensely in the inevitable tough times.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/08/equal-or-better-preferably-better_10.html
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Sept 11, 2001 - Pain, Giving, Renewal – Sept 21, 2008

A quote:
Not long after, I knew something terrible was happening when I saw on TV, a fireball explosion of immense intensity in the other tower. As we now know, that was the next airplane hitting the 2nd tower, a scene that was played over and over during the morning and is as horrific to watch now as it was then.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/09/sept-11-2001-my-view-from-brooklyn-not.html
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Mistakes - Responsible or Irresponsible? – September 28, 2008

A quote:
There are two kinds of mistakes in life, Responsible or Irresponsible.

The focus tends to be on (and should) the BIG irresponsible ones like adultery. misguided relationships or bad parenting but there are a host of others that can cause just as much misery including family, career, financial or lack of common sense.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/09/mistakes-responsible-or-irresponsible.html
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World Financial Crisis - Are you swimming or sinking? – October 12, 2008

A quote:
There are very few good things about this disheartening financial crises and it will strongly affect many people and countries for years to come. If you adhered to most of the aforementioned lessons, your pain is probably at worst bearable. If not, your pain is at best bearable and at worst a hole that you will never financially recover from.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/10/save-for-sunday.html
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Losing your Life: All at Once or One Day at a Time – Nov 16, 2008

A quote:
Two of the most dynamic and appealing men I know are as they say, "caught between a rock and a hard place". Lately, they have been on my mind as they have common ground in life similarities and level of marital suffering.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/11/losing.html
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GIVING is More Important than Ever – December 21, 2008

A quote:
There is an abundance of quality giving and I get inspired daily by articles I read, moments I see or stories I am told. Unfortunately, there is still a portion of our world (including some I know), who don’t do enough and only live in their tiny “ME” bubble. That must change and those of us who do give must challenge and encourage those less inclined to do more or at least do something on a consistent basis.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/12/yes.html
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Losing our Dads, Gaining a Son – December 28, 2008

A quote:
My father was an intelligent, humble, loving and giving man who tried his hardest to be the best father that he could. As I said at his funeral, “he wasn’t a great father but he was a good father”. While we had our differences (and arguments) when I was younger, when I look back, our confrontations are almost laughable as my father was stubborn and frustrated in not being able to impose his wisdom on me and I was arrogant in thinking I knew what was best for me. We both should have been more open-minded.

Link:
http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2008/12/losing-our-dads-gaining-son.html

The pond in front of my father-in-law's house - Southern Sweden

Sleep is the Cousin of Death

I’ve been averaging 6 hours of sleep per night for as long as I can remember although a recent week was considerably less due to an early train for work and a sports event.

Every April, I watch the USA championship game in college basketball. Unfortunately, it begins at 3am Swedish time. This game is near and dear to me since I love basketball and played the sport in college. This particular night, I woke up at 3am and after the game ended at 5:30, I was inspired to write an article for my blog. It was a great night!

Despite my 4.5 hours sleeping average the week of the sports event, it was a productive and interesting work week. I felt good.

I’m not advocating sleeping less as I believe sleep is important… BUT I do think some of us sleep our life away and miss doing the things we love.

Sleeping too much won’t bring about a literal death although figuratively, the death can be profound. By choosing sleep over living life to the fullest, one can bring death to the spirit or mind.

In my opinion, 7-8 hours of sleep is good for any adult although anything over 8 is time that could be spent doing something else albeit work, exercise or a passion.

I’ve heard numerous people talk about “not having enough time” or “being too busy to pursue a hobby”. When I inquired about their sleeping habits, it was clear that a modest decrease would bring about a dramatic change in their life.

I’m glad I function well on 6 hours of sleep. It gives me plenty of time (2-6 hours weekly) to write which is my top personal passion. In addition, I also have time for other “Me Time” interests. At this point in my life, I couldn’t even imagine sleeping 8 hours.

For those who sleep 8-10 hours and don’t feel that you’re living a full life (generally speaking means lack of “Me Time” in my opinion), I have two simple tips:

1) Read my two articles on “Me Time” :

http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2009/05/master-your-me-time.html   -  May 2009

http://gswede-sunday.blogspot.com/2010/03/mastering-your-me-time-revisiting.html  - March 2010

2) Sleep 1 hour less every night:

That’s an additional 7 hours a week to do whatever tickles your fancy. That’s more than an entire day you will gain per month!

If your life isn’t progressing in the manner you like or is in a “spiral of spiritual death” due to an abundance of sleep, don’t be afraid to get your soul back on track by sleeping less and living more. Be bold.

While sleeping might not be the cousin of death”, TOO MUCH sleep can be.

Happy Gswede Sunday!

Summer 2009 - (Picture by Heidi)

The Resolve of an Entrepreneur

I’ve helped or counseled numerous individuals over the years, both in life and business. This is the first time that I’ve worked so closely with an entrepreneur (also a friend) in terms of helping him succeed.

This individual has three things I like – Good Man, Great Mind and Steely Determination.

Good Man - Being a good man is something I pride myself on being and expect in others I lend a helping hand to. Despite the sometimes overwhelming obstacles he has been confronted with after moving to Sweden, his good man nature is intact.

Great Mind – After seeing him mastermind a well-attended fundraising concert for victims of a horrible tragedy, I knew he had what it takes to succeed as an entrepreneur. The speech he eloquently delivered after the musicians performed was powerful and confident along with presenting an important challenge to those in attendance.

In addition, I’ve had many private conversations with him on a variety of topics and he never fails to make me think or be interesting. He also has a savvy technological brain and a great view of what appeals to consumers.

Steely Determination – His current entrepreneurial project is exciting and timely, especially with the fast changing technology around the globe. The drive to start-up his company along with the discipline it takes to obtain investment has been nothing less than fierce. After two years of dogged pursuit, he’s very close to getting his first angel investor.

I expect great things from this man as his idea is one that a) should appeal to consumers on a broad scale and b) is in one of the world’s hottest industries – an industry currently in an infant stage compared to where it will be ten years from now.

He is crossing over a big hurdle (investment) currently although the challenge of building a first class company is no easy task and will probably be the most difficult thing he has ever done.

I believe he is destined to make a lasting impact in our society.

To achieve his dream, he has to believe in that destiny despite the jagged roads or dangling cliffs that may lie ahead. The level of his belief, strength of his resolve and doing whatever it ethically takes to make his idea shine among the masses will determine how great his company will be.

Happy Gswede Sunday!

April 2011 - Gswede's daughter enjoying a taste of summer

Team Success and the 4 C's

I’ve worked on numerous teams throughout my career in sales/fundraising; for small and large companies in the USA, Serbia and Sweden. During that time, there were a few that thoroughly exemplified the 4 C’s – Confidence, Competence, Commitment and Caring.

In my opinion, those aforementioned elements are crucial for any team to succeed at the highest level. Two teams (let’s call them X and Y) were the most impressive.

Confidence – To be effective in any endeavour requires confidence. Teams X and Y had confidence to spare.

Competence – The time spent with these teams was wonderful in terms of results and the overall competence played a big role in our success. That knowledge along with the ability to use it to achieve challenging goals inspired me on numerous occasions!

Commitment – One can be confident and competent yet lack the commitment it takes to succeed in a competitive business world. I didn’t see any evidence of a team member not being 100% committed to our goals.

Caring – Last but not least is the caring aspect of teams X and Y. Numerous team members spent time with me during my first year to make sure I understood the industry which gave me great insight on how to succeed. They also were gracious with their feedback when I peppered them with questions.

In addition, I didn’t see or hear about any jealous acts or insincere commentary which was refreshing. I also like the fact that we tended to tease or make fun of each other occasionally which I consider the sign of a caring team. Some of my best laughing moments have been with these teams!

The importance of caring should not be overlooked in business or life and separates these teams from others I have worked with. With some, there were those who only cared about themselves or weren’t as committed to our goals. While these individuals may have had personal success, the team’s ability to perform at the highest level was compromised.

I had an interesting, challenging, fun and successful time with teams X and Y and much of that emanated from the 4 C’s. Life has been good to me and I enjoyed most of the teams I’ve worked with although these two were special.

Here’s hoping your team possesses the 4 C’s – Confidence, Competence, Commitment and Caring.

Happy Gswede Sunday!

A man's fire of wood on the beach in southern Sweden

"IF" - The Kipling Poem

During an enlightening conversation with a  professor, a poem by Rudyard Kipling came up. I hadn't thought about the poem in quite some time so I was anxious to read it again. Immediately after I left his office, I read it slowly and absorbed its power and eloquence.

It gave me a tremendous boost of inspiration that afternoon!

You will find the poem below in its entirety.

Happy Gswede Sunday!
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IF

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream -- and not make dreams your master;
If you can think -- and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings -- nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run --
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And -- which is more -- you'll be a Man, my son!

(http://www.poetryloverspage.com/poets/kipling/if.html)

Venice - "IF" you have never been to Venice, Italy, it's worth a visit! (picture by Bill)

An Injury didn’t Deter my Basketball Success

From the time I was 10 years old, I was usually the best basketball player on the court. The sport came easy to me and I was fortunate to have a) supportive parents and b) a man with a great basketball mind as my first coach.

Entering high school (10th grade), I was the lone sophomore on the starting five of our basketball team along with 4 talented seniors. Before I burst onto the scene, it was a certainty that the starting team would be five seniors so many of those senior players weren’t too happy with my prime position. They made it very physical and tough on me in practice which didn’t faze me as I knew my talent was at a minimum, equal to theirs. Also, one of the popular teammates (a senior) had to take a backup role due to my presence.

The often harsh treatment inspired me to deliver deft offensive moves every practice and display an astute knowledge of the game, quickly earning their respect. It was an exciting time as I knew the year would be fun and my skills would be tested at the highest level!

During an early season game, my perfect world of basketball bliss came to a screeching halt. As I was running down the court, I accidently ran into an opposing player rather forcefully. At first, I thought nothing of it although soon thereafter, my shoulder was throbbing. I had a broken collarbone.

By the time my injury healed, the season was nearly over and I never had the chance to find my rhythm. The team had smashing success without me which I was happy about, finishing with a record of 28-4. Being the best outside shooter on the team, I can only imagine what we could have achieved with me in the starting rotation.

This injury was probably the best thing to happen to me. It made me workout harder, improve my discipline and obtain a stronger focus. I made these changes in order to limit injuries along with giving me the best opportunity for a productive and stellar final two years - time that would be crucial for impressing college basketball coaches.

Fortunately, I averaged 23 points per game my junior and senior years and was injury free. In addition, I was twice named to the team of the best 15 players in my region – called “The Big 15”.

Would I have been a better player if I didn’t get injured? Who knows? What I do know is that I wasn’t going to let anything or anyone deter me from achieving the goal I had since I was young – receiving a basketball scholarship. I had worked extremely hard perfecting my skills before the injury so I considered it nothing more than a small obstacle or in car terms, a bump in the road.

I played 4 years of Division 1 College Basketball at the University of Vermont. That basketball scholarship allowed me the privilege of a free education and a wonderful university experience.

In sports or life, sometimes a curveball is thrown our way in the form of an injury or unfortunate incident yet one can’t allow these short term distractions to deter a goal or dream.

Basketball has taken me a long way in life and provided opportunities I may otherwise not have had. I’m thankful for that as well as achieving my goal despite an untimely injury.

Happy Gswede Sunday!

The University of Vermont provided great opportunties for Gswede

(Picture by Tony Friede)

A Powerful Story on Honesty

It's not often that I come across a fictional story that exemplifies honesty as well as other admirable traits.

Honesty is not always the easy route as evidenced by all the greed (i.e. Financial Crisis) displayed around the world in the last 3 years. And when nobody is watching or one is away from family/friends, honesty can occasionally take a back seat.

In addition, some people tend to shy away from honesty towards others as they fear hurting them or telling the truth. An honest opinion or comment is exactly what a person needs to hear more often than not. Sometimes, the “truth hurts”.

“Honesty is the best policy” is not only a well-known cliché but something that if adhered to, can make life much easier and success more fulfilling.

Enjoy the story below.

Happy Gswede Sunday!
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Fictional Story on Honesty

A successful business man was growing old and knew it was time to choose a successor to take over the business.

Instead of choosing one of his Directors or his children, he decided to do something different. He called all the young executives in his company together.

He said, "It is time for me to step down and choose the next CEO. I have decided to choose one of you.”

The young executives were Shocked, but the boss continued. “I am going to give each one of you a SEED today - one very special SEED. I want you to plant the seed, water it, and come back here one year from today with what you have grown from the seed I have given you.

I will then judge the plants that you bring, and the one I choose will be the next CEO."

One man, named Jim, was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed. He went home and excitedly, told his wife the story. She helped him get a pot, soil and compost and he planted the seed. Everyday, he would water it and watch to see if it had grown. After about three weeks, some of the other executives began to talk about their seeds and the plants that were beginning to grow.

Jim kept checking his seed, but nothing ever grew.

Three weeks, four weeks, five weeks went by, still nothing.

By now, others were talking about their plants, but Jim didn't have a plant and he felt like a failure.

Six months went by -- still nothing in Jim's pot. He just knew he had killed his seed. Everyone else had trees and tall plants, but he had nothing. Jim didn't say anything to his colleagues, however, he just kept watering and fertilizing the soil - He so wanted the seed to grow.

A year finally went by and all the young executives of the company brought their plants to the CEO for inspection.

Jim told his wife that he wasn't going to take an empty pot. But she asked him to be honest about what happened. Jim felt sick to his stomach, it was going to be the most embarrassing moment of his life, but he knew his wife was right. He took his empty pot to the board room. When Jim arrived, he was amazed at
the variety of plants grown by the other executives. They were beautiful -- in all shapes and sizes.. Jim put his empty pot on the floor and many of his colleagues laughed, a few felt sorry for him!

When the CEO arrived, he surveyed the room and greeted his young executives.

Jim just tried to hide in the back. "My, what great plants, trees and flowers you have grown," said the CEO. "Today one of you will be appointed the next CEO!"

All of a sudden, the CEO spotted Jim at the back of the room with his empty pot. He ordered the Financial Director to bring him to the front. Jim was terrified. He thought, "The CEO knows I'm a failure! Maybe he will have me fired!"

When Jim got to the front, the CEO asked him what had happened to his seed - Jim told him the story.

The CEO asked everyone to sit down except Jim. He looked at Jim, and then announced to the young executives, "Behold your next Chief Executive Officer!

His name is Jim!" Jim couldn't believe it. Jim couldn't even grow his seed.

"How could he be the new CEO?" the others said.

Then the CEO said, "One year ago today, I gave everyone in this room a seed. I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today. But I gave you all boiled seeds; they were dead - it was not possible for them to grow.

All of you, except Jim, have brought me trees and plants and flowers. When you found that the seed would not grow, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you. Jim was the only one with the courage and honesty to bring me a pot with my seed in it. Therefore, he is the one who will be the new Chief Executive Officer!"

* If you plant honesty, you will reap trust

* If you plant goodness, you will reap friends

* If you plant humility, you will reap greatness

* If you plant perseverance, you will reap contentment

* If you plant consideration, you will reap perspective

* If you plant hard work, you will reap success

* If you plant forgiveness, you will reap reconciliation

So, be careful what you plant now; it will determine what you will reap later.

The beauty of the water from a beach in Mexico (picture by Mia)