You Aren’t a Risk Taker

We all say things in the heat of the moment or without thinking, although this example was memorable. 

Some years ago, a friend in the USA said to me:

“You Aren’t a Risk Taker”

The comment caught me off guard as this individual knew my history quite well.

While he did indulge in risks beyond the common person, to paint me in such a light was surprising. In addition, his words were filled with confidence.

 What I said next silenced him.

“Interesting that you don’t consider me a risk taker, yet I’m the one who has lived away from where I grew up - in Boston/New York City and abroad in Serbia and Sweden - while you have lived within 30 miles (50km) of your hometown your entire life.”

“Not only that, but I see my mother once a year and dear friends every few years at best.”

He never thought about that aspect of risk – leaving the ease of ‘everyone knowing your name’ for the uncertain future of a big city or foreign country.

While he had a strong appetite for adventure and throwing caution to the wind (which I admire), that didn’t apply to the comfort of living close to his parents, family and childhood friends.

Yes, I can be practical, reserved, careful, easy-going or relaxed (seemingly riskless to some), if you only look at my surface; which is what he had done. If you dig deeper, you will find plenty of passions, combined with a strong dose of sensible risk.

Was my friend more of a risk-taker than I was? Absolutely and I will never be at his level, yet to label me as risk-averse was not well thought out. If he had compared his risk to my risk, I would have understood and wholeheartedly agreed.

I believe the reason he never thought about my years outside of the USA (In Eastern Europe and the Nordics) as being filled with risk, is because it’s something he couldn’t imagine himself doing or even considering – which he admitted.

After our conversation, he felt differently and now has the utmost respect for those who leave the creature comforts of home and take the bold step of living outside of their birth country.

My final words to him were cliché yet poignant:

"Never judge a book by it’s cover.”

(The Shores of Southern Sweden)